Sunday, April 1, 2007

Conversation About Black GLBT Blogs

Disclaimer: I just want to say that I've been noticing some holier-than-thou sentiments in the blogosphere about what a blog should be, how people should express themselves in a blog, whether or not people should allow comments and engage in a dialogue with and "learning" from readers, and so on. Even if the sentiments are not meant to be "holier-than-thou," that is how they come off and that is not how I want to appear. I'm not just thinking about one blog/blog owner, and I'm not necessarily being critical. I think every blog has its place and that every blog does and should add something different. Do and say whatever you will with your blog, because it is yours. Some of the blogs I noticed problems with have huge followings (including me) and, thus, obviously satisfy a lot of readers. There is simply no satisfying all of the people all of the time, and I do believe all of the blogs mentioned below are vital to the GLBT community.

I happen to, in addition to those blogs, be looking for something more and hope to provide that to a specific audience type--those who aren't out, those who are just coming out, those who are isolated from the GLBT community, those who feel as if they don't belong among blacks and/or the GLBT community, those who are more interested in race or black/GLBT discussions, etc. I want to discuss a lot of issues that many GLBT individuals face, particularly black ones, that are not anticipated by a lot of people before coming out or that a lot of GLBT individuals experience but are not being talked about. My blog is mainly a place for me to express myself, to not be judged and to express ideas and experiences that I feel are not being expressed elsewhere. It is not for me to be political, attract a huge readership, to make sure people are not offended and will keep coming back. If even one person is reading and thinks my voice is helpful to him or her--which I do know that at least one person is and does--then I am satisfied. Below is a conversation with one such person.

nunya (11:13:45 PM): a lot of the time, i see stuff mentioned on other blogs and it gives me ideas, or i think about things that i would have liked to see other people write about but they don't
anon (11:14:23 PM): like what
nunya (11:15:02 PM): well, for example, i don't care for how pam's house blend, keith boykin and jasmyne all seem to be kind of political gay blogs. they aren't really all that personal, except jasmyne's [blog] is when she writes about weight
nunya (11:15:17 PM): i don't want to read black bloggers focusing more on being gay and the media
nunya (11:15:20 PM): that's just me
nunya (11:15:28 PM): or if you focus on being gay, be personal sometimes
nunya (11:15:40 PM): it's helpful to people who are not out or who don't have a lot of interaction with the gay community
anon (11:16:02 PM): yeah...cuz they can be so far removed sometimes
nunya (11:16:16 PM): and then you know that black lesbians are very invisible and don't really have a voice
nunya (11:16:34 PM): and that's one thing that makes it even more difficult to tolerate the lack of personal touch on some of these black lesbian blogs
nunya (11:17:09 PM): i also get tired of feeling like i'm attacked for not being out, not that anyone is attacking me directly. but just comments people make about coming out irritate me
anon (11:17:49 PM): it's so weird sometimes they act like it's an either or thing
nunya (11:17:48 PM): yeah
anon (11:17:55 PM): either you're OUT AND LOUD AND PROUD
nunya (11:17:54 PM): haha
anon (11:18:08 PM): or you're a sad, self-loathing closet case who deserves only to be pittied
nunya (11:18:07 PM): i know
nunya (11:18:19 PM): and i just don't understand how they can't understand that's not every gay person
nunya (11:18:25 PM): i have never really hated being gay or hated myself for that
nunya (11:18:30 PM): i don't hate myself for anything
anon (11:18:51 PM): or how they assume that gay is the most important qualification of a gay person
nunya (11:18:52 PM): omg, i know
nunya (11:19:02 PM): and that's another thing i wonder about those black blogs
nunya (11:19:05 PM): the black gay ones
nunya (11:19:31 PM): i actually would also like to know, for pam's house blend, her story of dating and marrying a white woman
nunya (11:19:40 PM): what has she gone through, how did they meet and get together, etc
nunya (11:19:45 PM): that kind of thing is interesting
anon (11:20:43 PM): that kind of thing makes me mad..but i don't have a right to be. i still get intrigued by it though
nunya (11:20:48 PM): haha, you're mad at interracial dating?
anon (11:21:07 PM): well...not all the time
anon (11:21:19 PM): but i do get mad when i see black women who date nothing but white women
anon (11:21:24 PM): and don't even consider black women
nunya (11:21:25 PM): exactly, exactly
nunya (11:21:35 PM): and that's another thing i would be interested to know about pam
nunya (11:21:46 PM): but it's none of my business
nunya (11:22:01 PM): i have discussed my view on my blog, though, so a viewpoint is out there
anon (11:22:23 PM): there is something very wrong with that.
nunya (11:22:57 PM): i do kind of understand if you're in predominantly white environments, but i really think a lot of blacks just have this problem with blacks
nunya (11:23:22 PM): it's really disappointing to me to kind of see that black gays are like straight black males
anon (11:23:33 PM): i know, right?
nunya (11:23:41 PM): it just goes to show that anyone can be ignorant, haha
anon (11:23:47 PM): it's so sad, cuz even the black gay dudes ...same thing
anon (11:23:55 PM): little snow queens